Selfish Revenge

Just another mistake, another bump in the road
One from which I can never recover
This one is it, the end of the road
Interesting enough that all the roads to here were empty

I never wanted it to turn out this way
Hoped for something better, something to bring happiness
The only thing I feel now is muted regret
How could I have missed the signs, they were screaming stop

How would it feel?
To have everything you’ve ever done turned back
Everything wrong re-lived out from the other perspective
How would it feel?

I’m sorry I left you alone
I didn’t know how to feel; how to act; how to love
It’s too late now, you’re too far away
I know how you felt

Dark. Lonely. Ashamed.
I wish I was more than I am now
I would plan my escape, get out right now
That can’t happen though, I’m in to deep

I’ll put on a happy face
Pass through day to day; blend in; fade away
It’s inevitable, but maybe I can make it happen sooner
Move on rather than regress

You made me say this wouldn’t happen, but my heart knew better
I tried as best I could, but the pressure was too great
I don’t know what else to do; I’m at my rope’s end
I guess this is how things will stay

You say things aren’t this way, but you act like they are
I must do what I need to do, maybe you will understand
Most likely not though, you haven’t before
I wish you the best, have fun with the rest

Technorati Tags: Poetry

Merry Christmas

Merry Christmas from Montana! Well, Christmas was pretty good. I felt a bit out of place most of the time, and am really tired, but it's been a pretty good Christmas. The only thing that is not so fun about it is how far away from my home I am. Not too easy to go "when the going gets tough," so to speak.

I would hope that everyone had a Merry Christmas (not just happy holidays). This is brief, but at least I had a bit of time to write a little message.

Technorati Tags: Christmas · Family · Holidays

Off To Montana

Well, I'm about to finish up my laundry, and then can finish packing. After that in a few hours I'll be off to Montana to spend Christmas with Tiffany's family (and Parker of course). I must admit, I'm a little nervous, and I think it will be a little awkward. I think everything will be fine, but still a bit awkward (probably my fault, but unavoidable nonetheless).

We'll see for sure how it is. So far Christmas has been great. I was able to rise above the gloomy debt of Christmas shopping with presents from family with the presents from my family and from work. I just hope that I was able to get everyone taken care of the way that I wanted them to be.

Well, there's not much more to say other than that, so farewell for now. If I survive Montana, I will surely make contact again.

Travel · Christmas · Family

MySpace - The next kind of advertising?

Christmas sure is a busy time of the year! Well, at least if you procrastinate like I do and wait 'til the last week to shop. I've been up until about 1:30am for the last 2 nights wrapping presents that I had just spent about... oh... 4 hours shopping for.

Last night, in particular, was an interesting wrap-a-thon. Whilst toiling away at the menial task (though incredibly hard) of wrapping, I began to watch a show called Nip/Tuck, which airs on the FX channel.

I don't really watch the show, in fact, I had only seen it once before with my friend Tiffany, but there was nothing else on, and it was some big episode because The Carver's identity was about to be revealed. When presented with my other options, I chose to watch the show.

I wasn't paying much attention to it, but I knew what was happening because there had been a lot of commercials talking about it, as well as I saw an ad for it on the MySpace Home Page. That caught my attention a bit as it was not revolving ads, it was the featured profile. Now, this wasn't a shocker, because I had noticed it before, but it was there nonetheless.

Now it seems that the featured profile is always an advertisement for a company, which brings me to this question: are companies paying for this? I would think so, since the Nip/Tuck ad said "check out Nip/Tuck tonight on FX at 12pm", was on the front page the whole night, and was the only featured profile. Additionally, on the show itself, it showed the URL to The Carver's MySpace page a few times.

It seems that the social engine MySpace is now merely new(er) web advertising platform. When you go to the company's "group", you can join, create bulletins, add comments, etc. What is the intrigue with such a venue? Why would you want to be "friends" with some company like Wendy's.

I don't think that companies will make money off of anything on their group's page. All the advertising, I would think, would go to MySpace; I would even think it would cost to be on the front page as a featured profile.

The only thing that I can think of, at this moment, as to why companies would do things like this is that the companies then have a way to get information from customers. I would think that this method of advertising lets the company see how many people are interested (bored?) in their product at a certain point on the internet. They can also get feedback on their products, as illustrated by Wendy's Square Burger profile.

It will be interesting to see what happens with MySpace as more and more companies turn to this type of advertising, or maybe they really just want to be your friends (and some do, I know of couple of local companies that have profiles on MySpace, but I don't think they do so for advertising). I really think that MySpace has gone a bit overboard with the advertising on their site.

MySpace · Advertising · Social · Networking

Just Another Poem

A pain so great, relief unknown
Of only one I know, has ever felt this way
But be of good cheer; put on a happy face
For if others only knew, they would also feel this way
This cannot be so, not on a day like today.

But how could it be? I've never shown a sign
Things will never work out how I want them to be
I should accept how things are; I wouldn't want to be greedy
But I know how things will go; will only bring misery
But this is what I deserve; It should only happen to me

With this, I feel the pain
I even told you so one day
Your words brought reassurance; the pauses, more despair
But maybe, if said honestly, I should only feel more fear
Maybe, after it all, I'll know just how you care

I want to know, tell me how you feel
It's held deep down inside; merely let it free
The ties of fear, need only be cut
And once they are, you will feel no regret
But whatever you say, I'm sure I won't get

The clock ticks on, the feelings grow strong
Forget, it's your trade; Regret, your call sign
It's a vicious cycle, composed only of choice
I crumble as I feel the memories fade; strength becomes weak
Love. . . becomes hate

At last, a whisper, my one dying breath
Ironic to think, you were always willingly deaf
You say you are there, but only for yourself
Curiosity is selfish, but great for relief
I don't know what to think, I just wish you were here

With this it all ends, I must feel regret
But this is my end, my time to give up
I've give it my all, but it's not enough
Put on a happy face, if only for a while
The face will hide the pain, denial is just as great

Poetry

So little time!

Wow! Christmas is in a week! I guess it's time for me to begin my Christmas shopping. I would like to make a special thanks to the wonderful people at FedEx, who, with their 2nd day and next day air, make such procrastination successful.

Time does seem to be moving fast though. It's hard to believe that christmas is almost here, and then a short time after that school will be starting up again. Such a vicious cycle that school is...

Whilst browsing the Science/Technology section of Google News, I happened to run across an interesting article about Polar Bears drowning because of the melting ice shelves. Worth the read, so if you are interested I would check it out.

http://www.timesonline.co.uk/article/0,,2087-1938132,00.html

Christmas · Ice Shelves · School

Old Old Video

Well, I thought that people would like to see this video that my friend and I did a few years ago when we were in 10th grade. He (the salesman in video) was taking multimedia and they had a project to make a commercial, so of course he created the idea of ManlyWare.

Basically it evolved into non-manly items being used to hurt someone (more correctly, me). Well, I hope you all enjoy. And please, don't judge the movie based on the acting alone.

You can view the movie here. You will need a program that can play Windows Media Video to view the movie.

Technorati Tags - Funny · Videos

Why are there Race Riots in Sydney?

Well, it has been quite a long time since I have made a post, mainly due to school work. Blasted generals take so much time, yet I still find them pointless. Oh well, that is done. Hopefully I will get near a 4.0; 3.5 easily.

The great part about school being over is that I now have time to follow current happenings. However, I may just want to continue with stupid generals when faced with the overwhelming stupidity of the human race. Honestly, what is going on in Sydney, Australia?

Well, I guess that intro was a bit harsh. I cannot condemn the entire human race based on the actions of a small group. After all, I must say that I am a member of the human race. However, the actions happening in Sydney are intolerable.

"About 5,000 white men, many of them drunk, targeted people believed to be of Arab or Middle Eastern descent on Cronulla Beach on Sunday after rumors spread that Lebanese youths assaults two lifeguards earlier this month." So, rumors have it that Lebanese youth assaulted two lifeguars, so 5,000 drunk people start randomly attacking people that they believe to be Arab or Middle Eastern!?

I guess that no matter what advancements take place, there will always be those in the society that are intolerant of particular groups. The problem is that there is no solution. I mean, we could kill all those who are intolerant of others, but that would make us intolerant of those people, perpetuating the problem. It will be interesting, however, to see how the problem is handled down in Sydney, as well as the reaction around the world.

Well, until next time, I guess this rant is finished. Hopefully soon I will be able to browse Google News again without becoming infuriated.

Technorati Tags - >Rascism · >Sydney · >Riots · Current Events